Let me be clear on this first; there’s a big difference with the outcome of filing a civil case and a criminal case. I have always stressed to those who have emailed me that a civil case is enough to get child support. That’s why I got really irritated when I received an email from an unknown saying that she has filed a criminal case against the father of her child some months ago; after my first entry about child support. My intention in making known the Violence Against Women and their Children Act is to stress a point; that YOU can do something to fight for your rights and that the GOVERNMENT is doing something for us, mothers. A warrant of arrest has been dispatched for the man, who for 3 years has not given her a single penny. Do not thank me if you just want to use the knowledge I’ve imparted to get revenge.
A civil case will fortify your rights for child support until your child turns 18 years old. A criminal case will most probably put your ex in jail, and you will not get a penny if he’s in the slammer. Again, let me be clear – a criminal case is your last option when all else fails; and that includes begging, groveling and filing a civil case. I feel really depressed that this has happened and I blame myself for this incident. If the man is lucky, he will probably just be put under probation; but what company in their right mind will want to hire a person who was found guilty of a crime?
November 30th, 2007 - 1:07 pm
i just want to use this to thank you for all the informations you have here in your site with regards to child supports and ect..you enligthen me thanks
April 25th, 2008 - 1:03 pm
Hi!
What if the father is in the philippines? He was deported 9 years ago and on his 5th year there, decided to give up on us. Is there hope to file a civil case?
Appreciate it if you will comment on this.
God Bless!
April 25th, 2008 - 8:29 pm
Hi Gigi. Sorry, I got a little confused with your question. If the father is in the Philippines, then you can pursue a civil case. However, if he is not in the country, there’s really nothing you can do. Hope that answers your question
July 20th, 2008 - 4:18 am
I have a friend who is now 8 months pregnant and is living in with her bf and the father of her baby. I am quite concerned about her and the child because I learned that the guy was recently fired from his job and that he has 4 other kids from his previous relationships. And he is not able to support any of them.
My friend loves this guy and believes in him so much that she doesn’t listen to any of our advice. I think this guy is bad news and that he is really just using my friend so that he can live comfortably. My friend works at a call center and earns around 25k a month. they live in a condo in Makati. My friend shoulders the rent and all the bills, including her monthly pre-natal checkups. Now that the guy is jobless and my friend is about to give birth, I don’t know what will happen.
What can I do to help my friend? Because it’s obvious to me and to all of us that this guy is just using her and has made it a habit to impregnate women without any intention of being responsible for any of them.
July 20th, 2008 - 7:30 am
Hi Liv,
Unfortunately, there’s really nothing you can do legally, but be sure to be there for your friend when things get rough. I am afraid that your friend is in for the ride of her life, as this guy is obviously not a good father. You can also intervene through her parents, but since she might be already an adult, all they can do is talk to her.
In our culture, this next advice would be downright shameful; but what the heck! Do you know the other women he has children with? Maybe they are willing to file criminal cases against the guy. With 4 (is he a sperm donor by profession?) women filing similar cases against him, there’s a big possibility that he’ll go to jail. Mwahahahaha!
You’re a great friend and I’m glad that she has you on her side!
Cheers,
Jackie