Note: The sperm donor actually saw a draft of this, and I was totally pissed off. You can just imagine the tantrum I threw. It was supposed to be an email sent out to him today - my gift for him on valentine’s day. You might think that its sweet that I’m writing it here, but he doesn’t read my blog anymore so he may not end up reading this at all. Anyway, here goes …

Don’t love me because I am beautiful or sexy. Even though beauty can be bought in bottles or tubes, time will catch up and gravity will prevail. Nature will scar my body, manmade concoctions will make me fat. Old age will erase the once flawless skin, but the essence of my womanhood will continue to glow. So therefore, love me even when I am old, fat and ugly; for inside I will remain to be the woman you so adore.

Don’t love me because I will care for you until you or I die. My mind may someday be preoccupied with other matters aside from you, my children will take up my time. I cannot promise to be always there when you need me, for no one is really available to only one person. Love me because I will make sure that everyday, in little ways, I will show you how much I care for you.

Don’t love me because I am a good mother. I will lose my patience and may end up spanking my kids. I will even shout, scream and pull my hair out of frustration. Love me for you know I will do everything in my power to keep my children safe from harm, loved and cherished no matter what they do to make me go insane.

Don’t love me because I’m hardworking, ambitious and goal oriented. For there will be times when I will lose focus, I will become lazy and hopeless. I may even cower at the first sign of responsibility. Love me because you know that I will be your equal and your partner. Love me more for you know that your dreams are my dreams, and we strive toward the same goal.

Don’t love me because I am passionate in bed. For time will come when I will no longer be able to perform. Old age will require us to sit together side by side, with only our conversations to keep us sane and entertained. Love me because I will never leave your side even when our body fails us.

Most of all don’t love me just because I love you. Love me because you know that our relationship is based on friendship, trust and a deep understanding of each other’s natures; and not borne out of lust and boredom.

Understand that I love you not because you make me happy, but that you make me happier. I love you not because you give me strength, but that you make me braver and able to face stronger foes. I love you not because you provide for me, but because you have taught me that I can provide for myself. I love you not because we are connected for life through our children, but because we have a kind of bond that is not easily broken. I love you because of what I am, with or without you.