The question most asked by many women is how much they can ask for child support. Although there are a lot of factors to consider, usually it’s around 25% to 30% of the father’s salary, but not less than P3,000/month. I’ve repeated this information a couple of times already, but I would like to expound on this topic; due to the volume of emails I’ve been receiving.

The first thing you do is to calculate how much you spend for your child. Clothing, food, lodging, education, health care, nanny, etc. Expensive and unnecessary toys, travel and other forms of entertainment should NOT be included in this calculation. Children may have a right to entertainment, but this is not a NECESSITY!!! Privileges and rights are not the same thing. If you live with your parents and do not pay for any bills, please do not include lodging in your calculation. Be realistic with your calculations and stop making up expenses just because you want to receive a larger amount. Shame on women who do this!!! Shame! Shame! Shame!

I made my own calculations, and I spend aroundd10,000 to 15,000 a month for my son – this includes tuition fees, clothes, nanny and everything else that he needs to survive. Please note that I am living on my own, and I pay for all the bills. This is not a standard for all children!!! This amount doesn’t include emergency expenses such as medications and hospitalization.

The next step is to consider how much the father makes and how many children he is supporting. The law may be on your side, but you also have to understand that these fathers have lives of their own, and they need money to support themselves. Talk to the father, and ask if he can shoulder half of the child’s monthly expenses. If he can’t, then you have to compromise. Less monthly support, but ask him to shoulder entertainment and health care expenses. Sometimes it’s not fair that moms shoulder more than the fathers, but there’s really no getting around it unless your ex has a deep pocket and is willing to pay for everything.

The last step is to RECONSIDER YOUR CHILD’S LIFESTYLE. We all want the best for our children, but that doesn’t mean that they have to wear designer outfits or eat gourmet food everyday. If you can’t afford it, don’t buy it. Work around a budget for your child, in this way you save some money, also.

I also want to add that the monthly child support should be spent on your child, and not you! A lot of women think that just because their boyfriends got them pregnant, they should also be receiving a certain amount to spend on their manicures and pedicures. Child support is not welfare, so please don’t become charity cases. If you don’t understand what I mean, here’s putting it simply: don’t ask your exes to spend for you because it’s not their obligation to do so.